its been so busy that ive been working like 18 hr days, and have seriously neglected the bathroom.. beyond the point of communicable danger. so as i was about to take a shower & just bear with it one more night, i strip down and as i wait for the water to get hot enough the inspiration to scrub the toilet overtook me. so there i was butt nekkid scrubbing the bowl with one rubber glove on. finally satisfied when the fumes of chemical fruit burn the back of my throat.

since i had those gross rubber gloves on, the only thing i wanted to do is wash that rubber glove smell off my hands. so i get in the shower and immediately wash my hands, which breaks my traditional routine. i scrub my hands which unconsciously turns into washing my body, and getting lost under the shower head. now im turned all upside because i broke my shower routine which consists of me first standing under the shower for a few minutes, then shampoo, then wash my body, then get lost under the shower head again for a few mins, then shave, then brush my teeth, then stand under the head again for god knows how long. so my shower was unsuccessful tonight thanks to my toilet because i broke routine and had to think in there, instead of what i usually like to do which is leave my brain at the shower door and go into auto-pilot.

had an odd dream, well all dreams are odd i guess, i just happen to remember this one pretty clearly

i was in a car driving on an overpass into the city at night with 3 other people. the guy in the back seat with me was like my date or whatever. and 2 in front, i couldnt see the guy driving but i think the girl was black with long black hair. then we are all ontop of this bunk bed, but its like a building. 2 or 3 stories tall, with streets on either sides, and cars driving around it. were all looking around, not realy frightened but sorta in awe, with the wind blowing around as we sat on top of this really tall bunk bed thing. then theyre at the bottom on one side of it and me and this guy are on the other and hes clearly horny and motions that he wants to climb back up the ladder to the top. so we climb up the ladder and when we get to the top, he takes off his pants and is standing up there, but it freaks me out because hes right on the ledge. so i have him lay down, and as im going down on him and deep throating him, i can see my reflection in his belly and i look hideous. really long stringy hair, dark circles, and deep sunken eyes. i think a big mole on my nose. really ugly. then hes gone and im alone, and the top “bunk” is now a huge bath that we are cooking clams in. the water is dark and hot but im swimming around in it, pulling up clams and eating them. some are out of their shells and i just am spooning them into my mouth from the water. i kick one unopened clam off the side and it falls off this huge bunk bed thing onto the street. and i wonder where the others 3 are. so i look below and the other 3 people plus someone else are all having sex on the bottom bunk. and then i wake up.

godfather yiwits

so i was asked to be the godfather of a family members child. and eventhough they know im a complete atheist they wanted me to be a part of the childs life, in a more meaningful way then just a relative. (whatever that means) so i accepted because well, i love the person who asked me, and know the religion aspect of it all is secondary to them and to me. the gesture of them asking me is more of a way of solidifying our relationship even more. so yes of course id love to be the babys godfather.

BUT…

what an incredible pain in the ass this is all becoming. besides the fact that im probably going to drop about $3000 on just this one day of the christening alone, i have to do all this jumping through hoops with this fucking church. i have to become a member of a church, (which i am completely not ok with) which it seems i am not currently. i just assumed that because i was baptized 36 years ago i was still a member, (ive got the missing foreskin to prove it.. can i use that as evidence?) but no im not a member, a member means i have to give these fuckers some money. so i got the form and it says i can give any amount, and fuck it im giving these fuckers $10. fuck them.

its so damn expensive and time consuming just organizing and ordering all the shit because i have to not only order all this stuff for the day of the baptism, like the special outfit, special oil, special candles and jewelry for the baby, and a whole shit ton of other shit, i also have to buy all the favors for all the 150+ guests. which is so goddamn expensive. and im so swamped with work that i can only start all of this after im done with this cycle of work, but then its cutting it real close to the delivery times when all these favors and boutineers and all this other shit i have to order may get here before the day of the christening. so i have to worry about it getting here on time. and on top of all that, i have to actually go to church and make an appearance on sundays. i think its 4 or 5 church visits before and 4 or 5 after the day of the christening. it actually says on there that i have to do these things to avoid any “embarrassment” on the day of the christening, which essentially means if i dont do these things the priest may decide the day of the christening that he wont perform it at all. these fuckers are world class blackmailers. i mean i could care less, but its important to my family member, so ok, whatever.

so this is why i have to lose like 25lbs in a month and 1/2… i think i can do it… ugh.ugh.ugh. i really want to lose this weight so i can buy a cool little mad men suit (is that cool anymore?… i dont even know… im old and i dont know. ugh…im going against every instinct in my body and actually joining a church… wtf)

anyway, its good to be my age and be a kind of father figure to a little kid, because i prob wont have kids so itll be good to have someone who feels obligated to take care of me when im old and dying.

pizzahouse just reminded me of the time in high school when i worked at kmart and told the nice black lady i worked with that she has to be my slave

i was going to work some shift for her, and she was like thank you ill do whatever you want, and i was like you can be my slave for the week, like in terms that she would do my inventory, take care of shitty customers that kind of thing, i didnt really think of it in racial terms, but immediately as i said it i was like ‘fuck!’. her response was ‘homey dont play that’ because it was the early 90s

since the reddit controversy exposed the army infiltrators posting pro army propaganda under fake accounts on reddit, i feel its time to come clean and confess that i was hired by the homosexualists of america to post pro-homo propaganda to promote homosexualism. our ultimate goal is to take down the govt as it is, and replace it was a pink army, and rename it the united homosexuals of america. i will not expose my other comrades’ tumblrs…

so my brother-in-law is just an asshat. hes just someone id never be friends with if he wasnt married to my sister. when she decided she wanted to marry him, i knew i had do my best to get along with him. so we figured out we are both atheists which is cool i suppose, but he is still an asshat. like the other day he was talking about how recently hes been seeing the number 666 everywhere and on different things, and it was freaking him out. and im like well that shouldnt bother you since you dont believe in the devil. and hes like ‘no, but i believe in ghosts’.

ugh. if youre over the age of 16 and still believe in ghosts youre a fucking asshat. (i think 16 is pushing it too)

so less then 2 months ago i bought a new imac, and last week the harddrive failed, so i brought it in to the apple store monday. they said the only thing they can do is replace the harddrive, but i was pissed, and i wished it had really broken so i could get a brand new one. then they called me to say it was ready for pickup. i go there tonight and the guy turns it on to show me its now working, but since its a new harddrive i would have to start from scratch and enter everything. so at that point i didnt see the desktop to know what OS was installed, i just assumed it was the newest one. so the apple guy turns it off and goes to place the imac into the box and drops it straight down into the box with a really loud bang. he brings it back out all apologetic, and inspects it and he seems to think its ok, because the corner fell directly onto the styrofoam. but i was pissed, and getting more pissed. i kept saying ‘thats a problem’ but he tried to assure me that that shouldnt do anything to the computer. he goes to turn it on again to run a diagnosis and then i had to enter all my info in at that point, it was after that that i realized they didnt even install the newest OS, they had the old one (snow leopard) installed. not lion! i was getting more and more pissed. and the guy could tell, he was all apologetic and said how that that was unacceptable. then hes like we are going to install the new OS now. that i should go to the food court and in 45 minutes itll be ready. i was so overwhelmed with everything that had just happened, and so pissed i knew if i stuck around i would lose my shit, so i said fine and left. i was wandering around the food court for 10 mins or so (of course its dec 22 & the mall is in crazy christmas time insanity) but i was able to calm down and went back in and this time spoke directly with the manager. i said i didnt have time to wait all that time for them to reinstall the new OS, and explained everything that had happened with this damn computer, that was hardly 2 months old at that point. the hardrive failed, theres some kind of clicking noise near the optical drive, this guy drops it, then they installed the wrong OS. it was ridiculous, and i told him i was not at all happy. so the manager went into the back to talk to the guy who helped me and both came out to tell me that they were going to give me a brand new imac right there, right now, as long as the one i bought wasnt a custom install, which it wasnt. he looked up my original purchase and had another one in their stock exactly like my original purchase. so i walked out of there with a brand new imac.

sweet

merry christmas from apple

finished season 3 of the wire, and wow!

this show really is phenomenal. was not expecting that!

though im pissed cause the dvds i got from the library were a little scratched so at an important scene between stringer and avon, when stringer confessed to avon what he did (i wont give away any spoilers). anyway the dvd was all fucked up at that part. so i knew it was an important scene and wanted to see the whole scene so i checked on youtube and found that exact point. so i watched, BUT you know at the end of every youtube video they show a bunch of related clips in the same video window? well the title of one of the related videos completely spoiled the ending for me by revealing what happened to one of the main characters in season 3. i was so pissed! i wasnt expect it, and thought it wasnt going to go that way. ugh. so because of some asshole who scratched up a dvd, the season surprise got spoiled. goddamn fucker.

we fuckin love our villians, dont we?

theres a twitter cap from that cunt from the westboro church that said she gonna protest jobs’ funeral, and that shit has like 5000 notes.

people dont understand that they thrive on the media coverage they get. if you just ignore them, they will just recede into the background, but in the interest of balanced news coverage, those assholes at cnn and all the other fucking news orgs will have to get their opinion on every fucking thing… like wha!… its retarded

i do realize i am being a hypocrite even posting about, but you know what… fuck you